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Currently in February I’ve been….

Working on a lot of projects all at once. This isn’t normally a problem I face, I am fairly good at organising my diary and saying no to extra things. I have learnt that I get thoroughly miserable when I don’t leave enough time in my week to do nothing! But right now I am juggling essay writing, blogging, house-moving preparations and creating a new Course for my church on top of my full time job. At the moment it is manageable and it should ease up about mid-March so I am not worried. In fact, I am really excited about these projects and I am glad they are happening! I just have to mindful of my commitments over the next couple of weeks!

Watching very silly horror movies. In the last few weeks Rob and I have laughed uproariously at the baffling Sharknado and the subversive Tucker and Dale vs Evil. For the record I have yet seen Alan Tudyk in anything where he is less than awesome. That man soars!

Eating special offers from College. The College where I work has a catering department that sometimes sell special treats at discounted rates to staff. The other week they were selling Chicken & Leek pies for £3. I got two! One has been readily devoured and the other is in the freezer waiting. I hope more offers come our way soon!

Indulging in Rocky Road. I had an odd Tuesday off work this month to fit in some appointments. To make the most of it I wandered into town for some high street shopping. I bought my veg from the grocers, meat from the butchers and then stopped by the bakers, ignored the bread and just got cake! Shopping is hungry work!

Crying  a lot. I have debated whether or not to mention this on the blog or not. A good friend passed away last week. He leaves behind a wife, children, grandchildren and a whole tribe of friends and family who are really going to miss him, myself included.

It felt wrong to carry on blogging about the little non-consequential things I love to write about when something so big has happened and not mention it. Although I am not sure whether I want to use the blog to process grief or my toughest struggles. Mostly I prefer to deal with these things in private with my own thoughts, my prayers and my close friends.

However, I read this moving piece from Cup of Jo who has been facing a similar situation. Which you should go and read. I think she has an important message that in the midst of our cupcakes and book posts we should raise our hands from time to time to say that ‘I, too am dealing with the messy and painful side of life’

There aren’t really strong silver-linings when someone passes away, even when you have faith that God has made a way for you to be reunited someday. It can still be a long hard walk ahead before you see them again.

Our world screams at us to strive for a greatness measured in wealth and beauty and fame, but one thing I have found by seeing the outpouring of love and grief at my friends passing, is that it is absolutely enough in life to love you family, to work hard and honorably, and to be a good friend. Honestly, it is enough, it’s more than enough.

My Mum said to me over the weekend that ‘we love him the same today as we did last week’. We will love him the same for the rest of our lives until we see him again. Love is the true measure of greatness and it does not diminish. Even when we depart, love goes with you and love is what you leave behind.

xx

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